This summer my sweet 10 year old Grace decided she wanted to start a garden.  Being the homeschooling Mom that I am…I said,  ”Great! This can be your summer science project.”  (my motto – everything in life is school!)  With that she began to research what might grow best in our backyard, purchased all the things she needed for her garden and began the hard work of weeding the area and preparing the soil for planting.

Besides her research on the Internet, her daddy helped provide some of the labor, her sisters cheered her on with support, her Aunt Caroline gave her the wisdom of her experience (which her parents completely lacked) and even Daniel chipped in to help start her garden!

Since we got going a little late, she began mainly with seedlings – deciding on corn, bell peppers, cantaloupe and tomatoes.  She also used seeds to grow carrots, pumpkins & watermelon.

After the initial planting she simply did two things almost everyday – watered & weeded.  Since we are blessed to live in the very fertile and very sunny Central Valley of California….God did the rest.  The garden grew! 

I was amazed at the growth. In fact it seemed like almost everyday there was noticable change….first in heighth and width, then in flowers blooming, then in density and before we knew it the garden was big, beautiful and bountiful! 

It became our morning ritual to go out to the garden and marvel how much everything had grown each & everyday.  It was miraculous to us that these things that we had planted were really growing into food that we could soon enjoy.

During this past month we were blessed with an abundant harvest of vegetables  – we enjoyed the incredible farm fresh taste, the convenience of bringing food in right from the backyard and the great satisfaction of having grown them ourselves.

These delicious vegetables also motivated us to try out some new recipes that made this gardening experience even richer for us.  There is something about taking your homegrown creations from this –

to this  (delectable gourmet tomato soup) that brings complete satisfaction of the body, soul & spirit -

As a new gardener I am still in awe of the fact that we were actually able to grow our own food.  To many, this probably  sounds silly….”why of course they grew”, you may be thinking, “I mean, what did you expect?”  I am not sure that I expected it to be so easy.  Just do the right things -

1. Prepare the soil
2. Plant the seedlings
3. Water & Weed

Hmmmmm…I am sure there is  life lesson in there –> just do the “right things” and you can expect good results.  That is simple right? 

Well almost.  We did have a few vegetables that we planted in other parts of our yard that did not fare as well – our watermelon, pumpkins & a few extra tomato plants. Yes, we prepped, planted, watered & weeded but the growth just did not happen like the plants in the main garden.  What was the difference? 

The amount of sun!

While these plants got some sun everyday, they were also shaded by trees and the house and did not receive full sunlight as the others did.  This resulted in not only slower & stunted growth (and even death of the watermelon plant that was in way too much shade) but a miniscule harvest and in some cases no vegetables at all.

We learned that sunlight was of utmost importance to the growth and development of our garden, no matter how diligent we were to care for the plants.  They simply needed more than what we could provide….they needed God given provision of sunlight.  Just like our lives.

We can do everything “right” and yet even with our best efforts we cannot completely grow & produce a bountiful harvest without God’s provision through His Son, Jesus Christ -

• His amazing grace
• His unfailing mercy
• His unconditional & everlasting love
• His perfect peace
• His powerful strength

How will you grow the garden of your life?

Will you move into the SON today and bask in the grace, mercy & love of God while being renewed by His peace & empowered by His strength so that you can grow, flourish and produce a life of abundance to be enjoyed by you and all those around you? I pray that we will all live in the Son.

I so wish that I could have been in Washington DC for the 9/12 March yesterday.  In fact just last Sunday I was looking at airline tickets and trying to figure out a way to come up with the money to fly out there. In case you are unaware of what the 9/12 March was…let me give you the 411.  The march yesterday which drew tens of thousands of people (some estimate 2 million) from all across America was a gathering of people from every walk of life, every race, every creed, every political and non political party who wanted to express their desire to see America return to 9 basic principles and 12 values. 

Here are the 9 principles:

1.  America is good
2. I believe in God and He is the center of my life
    ”The propitious smiles of Heaven can never be expected on a nation that disregards the eternal rules of order and right which Heaven itself has ordained.” from George Washington´s first Inaugural address.
3.   I must always try to be a more honest person than I was yesterday.
   “I hope that I shall always possess firmness and virtue enough to maintain what I consider to be the most enviable of all titles, the character of an honest man.” George Washington
4. The family is sacred. My spouse and I are the ultimate authority, not the government.
   “It is in the love of one´s family only that heartfelt happiness is known. By a law of our nature, we cannot be happy without the endearing connections of a family.” Thomas Jefferson
5. If you break the law you pay the penalty. Justice is blind and no one is above it.
     “I deem one of the essential principles of our government… equal and exact justice to all men of whatever state or persuasion, religious or political.” Thomas Jefferson
6.  I have a right to life, liberty and pursuit of happiness, but there is no guarantee of equal results.
   “Everyone has a natural right to choose that vocation in life which he thinks most likely to give him comfortable subsistence.” Thomas Jefferson
7. I work hard for what I have and I will share it with who I want to. Government cannot force me to be charitable.
    “It is not everyone who asketh that deserveth charity; all however, are worth of the inquiry or the deserving may suffer.” George Washington
8. It is not un-American for me to disagree with authority or to share my personal opinion.
    “In a free and republican government, you cannot restrain the voice of the multitude; every man will speak as he thinks, or more properly without thinking.” George Washington
9.  The government works for me. I do not answer to them, they answer to me.
    ”I consider the people who constitute a society or a nation as the source of all authority in that nation.” Thomas Jefferson

Here are the 12 values:

• Honesty
• Reverence
•  Hope
• Thrift
• Humility
• Charity
• Sincerity
• Moderation
• Hard Work
• Courage
• Personal Responsibility
• Gratitude

And yes they were there to protest – the current healthcare reform, the increase in government spending and trillion dollar deficit, tax increases, wealth redistribution to name a few. Here is a great slide show from a blogger friend of mine was there so you can see it for yourself  -http://picasaweb.google.com/BarbarasMommyLife/912MarchOnWashingtonDC?feat=embedwebsite#

These values & principles as well as protests combined with my pro-life/anti-abortion (let me be clear with the facts of science – abortion is the killing of a baby and should not happen in any society – there is an answer to unwanted babies it is called adoption) passion is what I am (or striving to be as I certainly have not arrived in several of these areas).

 During the past several months many of our leaders and media have classified people like me who have attended marches, tea parties, town hall meetings or protests in very unbecoming and untrue way. 

I am not:

• a Nazi  — I have never been nor will ever embrace socialism, white supremacy, anti-Semitism or fascism
• a racist — I do not see color or race but rather as Martin Luther King hoped for, I judge people on the content of their character.  I have very close friends of most every race – African American, Filipino, Mexican, South American, Korean. Oh and did I mention I have a precious & perfect baby girl who happens to be black that we adopted here in the USA?
• un American — I am a proud & patriotic American, raised in a third generation military family with both of my grandfathers serving in WWII (and one giving his life there).  I have voted in every election since I turned 18, proudly fly the American flag daily and participated in the celebration of our country, our national holidays and the democratic process my entire life.
• astroturf – this new name given to those protesting who are supposedly being paid to go protest by some big organization or corporation. Ummmm…no one has paid this lady a dime, nor recruited me let alone even talked to me. And FYI…I do not watch Fox news (have only had television reception since last Thursday), have never listened to Glen Beck (although I would love to) and catch perhaps a grand total of 1 hour per week of conservative talk radio while I am in the car driving my kids to all their actvities. 
• a homeland terrorist - I have never ever been involved in acts of violence or coercion against America or anyone for that matter and just because I am pro life, against illegal immigration, believe in state & local authority  and  am conservative I am going to be labeled a terrorist?
• “fishy” - simply by having legitimate concerns about the current healthcare reform bill and sharing those concerns with others makes me suspicious…hmmmm.
• a “tea bagger” – I am too classy to even respond to this base name calling by our media
• a moron  – some refered to yesterdays demonstration as the “Million Moron March”  So now I am being called a moron.  (I was there in spirit if not in flesh) I do not claim to be the brightest individual in the world but I am not stupid (the technical definition is an adult with the mental age of 8-12) and in fact graduated in the top 12 of my high school class (albeit in the California public schools), scored a 1200 on my SAT’s and earned a college degree from UOP.

Ok, I just thought I’d clear that up for everyone..although I doubt that the people who called me those names are reading my blog!  I will be at the next march and despite my very full life (ummm….8 children, homeschooling Mom, Director of Development for JECHS, Creative Memories Consultant and trying to do something to promote adoption) I will be campaigning for new congressmen & new senators that reflect what I am.

September 11, 2001

I was actually in the Washington DC area on a business trip on that fateful day in American history, along with my then seven year old daughter, Kristen. (she is now 15!) We were getting ready to fly home on that very same morning those planes were flown into the twin towers. 

Here is an excerpt from my photo album (I am so thankful that I took the time to write this down back then!)  -

From the moment I turned on the television at my mothers home in Springfield, Virginia…everything began to become surreal. I sat frozen alone on the couch as I realized the atrocity and severity of what was happening. Terrorists hijacked  two airplanes and crashed them into the twin towers in New York City. As the events unfolded I watched with horror along with millions of Americans who were glued to their television sets.  It was like we were watching a nightmare and wondering what might happen next and if we would ever feel safe again.

All I could think was that I wanted to be home with my family. I was 3000 miles away and with all air traffic being suspended indefinitely, there was no certainty of when I could get home. I called Dan who was still unaware of what was happening on the East Coast (It was still very early in California). He prayed for me & told me how much he loved me. He also shared how relieved he was that I was at home at my Mom’s and not on an airplane at that moment. As I sat back down to watch the unfolding drama I learned that another plane had crashed just down the freeway from where I currently was – into the Pentagon. I was stunned! What was happening…and what would be next? It was at that point I looked down at my confirmed airline itinerary dated September 11. 2001 from Washington DC to California. The full impact hit me. I easily could have been a passenger on one of those airplanes heading to California. I began to cry & praise the Lord that it was not my time to die and that I was not on an airplane right then being diverted to another city somewhere in the U.S. I was at my mothers home with my sweet daughter. I had a lot to be thankful for that day. We finally did get home four days later. (but not without several delays including getting stuck in Minneapolis for a night and being graciously taken in by a business associate Leanne Anderson) I was so happy to be home with my precious family.

In the aftermath of 911, it was inspiring to see patriotism come to life in America. Everywhere you looked people were wearing red, white & blue, flying flags, putting up signs & showing their love for their country & fellow citizens. Flags were everywhere – on every home, hanging from bridges, on cars, on buildings, on clothing…it was overwhelming & emotional. I found myself with eyes filled with tears and getting choked up several times a day as I witnessed the love of others and the patriotism that had been sorely missing in the daily life of most Americans. People also began to give of their time, talent & treasure in abundance. On every street corner money was being collected & people gave freely. Many volunteered their time and stood in line for hours to give blood. It was an incredible moment in history to witness this outpouring of love & generosity.

This tragedy of 911 also turned many peoples hearts back to the Lord and to faith. Everyone was in desperate search of answers and in great need of peace, hope & security. People were coming together in droves to pray and seek God. Our common faith in God became evident to all. The cross rose up out of the ashes of the towers and became a symbol of hope for those at Ground Zero in New York. We all knew that we desperately needed God. No one was offended by people praying or evoking the name of Jesus. There was a National Memorial Service broadcast worldwide where Billy Graham boldly proclaimed the gospel.

September 11, 2001 was truly a day that changed everything. 

Were you changed by the events of September 11? 

• Did you stop everything & order your priorities aright?
• Did you have a renewed sense of patriotism & love for the USofA?
• Did you weep with those who lost loved ones and hold your precious family closer?
• Did you give blood, donate your time or money in the aftermath?
• Did it draw you to the Lord?

Perhaps on this anniversary of 911 it would do us all some good to recommit to these same things today.  In this ever changing and turbulent times we are living…none of us knows what tomorrow will bring.

Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.  I Peter 5:8

It is so easy in the years following a disaster or life changing event to lose your resolve, be lulled into apathy or even forget the things that you thought would stay with you forever.  Take the time today to remember and recommit yourself to loving God, loving others, loving life and loving our country with the intensity we did after 911.

We here at the Lambdin home…will NEVER forget!

God Bless America!

47 years ago today….I was born.

My Celebration

Today I will celebrate my life!  My God given life - my abundantly blessed life – my 47 years on this earth – my health – my family & friends – my faith – my future!

I will celebrate with those I love and I will enjoy all the delights of the day! I will probably continue to celebrate throughout the week as well.

Yes, birthdays are a great time to celebrate life but they are also a time to reflect on the past and contemplate the future.

My Reflection

As I look back on my life, there is much for which to be thankful.   Mine is a life truly blessed.

• I was blessed to be born to a father & mother who loved life, loved the Lord and loved each other

• I was blessed to be born in America – land of the free and home of the brave!
• I had the wonderful experience of growing up with two sisters and a brother to play with, fight with, share with (no matter how unwillingly at times) and make memories together!

• I moved many times growing up in a military family which produced positive character qualities in my life as well as the awesome friendships that I made throughout the country
• I had a very unique and amazing high school experience, especially my senior year and senior class.  It was stellar and stands out as a highlight of my youth

• As a 16 year old, I encountered the Lord in a very personal way that has clearly affected most of my important decisions since that day in 1979

• I had a life changing summer at Hume Lake in 1981

• I experienced and got to be involved in  a season of amazing revival at the University of the Pacific through Chi Alpha ministries  in the early 80’s

• I had the honor & joy of being the youth pastor to the most amazing group of teenagers from every high school in Stockton & Lodi for four years.

• After praying for six years,  I was given by God the very best man that I could ever imagine to marry and share a life together. I am still in awe of God’s gift to me.

• I became passionate about the ministry of Christian education during my early years at Brookside Christian . It was my time at this school that molded me, shaped me and caused me to grow immensely.  The students & staff from that era  are precious friends and will always hold a prominent place in my heart.

• I have been blessed by God with children.  Truly there is nothing better in this life than the gift of children.  Sometimes I stop and wonder what I did to deserve these wonderful blessings.  I look at them in awe and thankfulness….they are my life!

• I  was “forced” into homeschooling by our life circumstances (as I would have never decided on my own to homeschool) and this has been the single best thing for my children and our relationship.  I will never give it up now!

• My Creative Memories business has brought a richness to my life that is beyond anything I could have ever imagined.  I have gotten to use and improve my gifts & talents, invest in others lives, experience amazing opportunities and make life long friendships in this committed community of consultants.

• Jim Elliot Christian High School is a miracle and I got the opportunity to be a part of  this one of a kind school.  After 11 years this school and the people involved continue to bring me joy, love and inspiration every day! I can only hope and pray that it will never end.

Now in my reflection of the past there are also regrets, sorrows, things I wish I could change and life lessons to be learned:

• I regret my indiscretions and poor decisions of my youth as well as the way I often treated my mother  & older sister when I was a teenager
• I did not fully use the intellect that I have been given to study and learn throughout my high school & college education years
• I would offer greater grace and show more compassion to the youth who were put under my charge as a youth pastor and teacher
• I would be more humble and vulnerable to those around me
• My older children would not have spent anytime in daycare and I would have trusted the Lord for His provision as He always proves Himself faithful.
• I would have been more frugal with my finances, especially during the more prosperous years
• After years as a high school & college athlete, I would have made healthy eating & daily exercise a life long habit, instead of  a “up & down” lifestyle
• I lost my father when I was 33 years old…I wish I could have been given more time here on this earth with him
•  I would have lost my temper less with my children, not “sweat the small stuff”  and spent more time praying with them and teaching them the Bible as well as studying and meditating on it myself
• I would have held my tongue and attempted to only speak words of encouragement, love and appreciation to my family

 My Contemplation

Reflecting on the past is always a good starting point for contemplating the future.  Looking at the positive & the negative of your past can help you purpose in your heart to plan a better tomorrow. 

The next time your birthday rolls around what do you want your life to look like?

What do you want to do, accomplish and change in the next 5 years, 10 years, 20 years?

What were you born to do?  What is your unique and special purpose here on this earth?

When you are at the end of your life (which when you are my age, if you have done the math,  you are aware that there are fewer years ahead of you than behind you)…what will you want your life to have looked like? What will be your legacy? What difference will you have made in the lives of your family, friends, church, workplace, city, country or world?

As I do every year around this time, I will once again be contemplating these questions and be purposeful about making needed changes in my life and making a plan to do and be all that God has for me in this life,  that He has given me.

When the final day of my life…my “deathday” arrives I want to not only be ready but I want to have lived a life that glorified God and I want to leave a legacy to future generations of Lambdin’s that will inspire them to live a purposeful life fulfilling their destiny.

This week, in the midst of getting prepped & ready for another year of homeschooling my K-8 crew, I realized that the back yard needed a bit of attention.  Ok, so maybe it needed a lot of attention.  The grass had grown to a point that it was two feet high in some areas and was nearly impossible for the toddler to play out there. (an essential aspect of homeschooling when you have little ones underfoot  is having a safe place to “shoo” them off to so you can spend some time attempting to teach in the short spurts you have available)

I kept hoping that my dear darling hubby would get to it and of course he would have…”sooner or later” (with later being the most probable) – but as is always the case at this time of year, he is fully immersed in the beginning of school (lesson plans, chapel scheduling, school camp preparations) and he is a coach for the JV Volleyball team which keeps him gone at practices and games until dusk almost daily.

So today, I stopped “hoping” and “wishing”, accepted the fact that I am a “coaching widow” once again this fall and got up and got going on the lawn (aka: jungle).   It took me three hours!  Between the blade continually getting stuck because the grass was still a bit damp and way too long, having to empty the grass catcher with every strip of lawn mowed, running over toys that were hidden so deep that there was no way I could have found them and having to actually mow the lawn twice – first on a higher setting and then on the normal height. 

The results -

• an overflowing  garbage can filled with just the grass cut today
• 
• a very sunburned, hand blistered, sweaty, sore and tired lady
• 
• a mostly yellow lawn for the next few days – since what is now showing has never seen the sun (but it is a great homeschool lesson in photosynthesis…right?)
• 
• a 10 year old who got a little training in lawn mowing
• 
• a newly cut lawn (although not anywhere close to my dear darling hubby’s high standard of lawn mowing, edging, trimming, raking etc… but hey it is done!)
• a little boy who can happily play ball in the yard again
• 

While mowing I had lots of time for reflection (after all there is not much else you can do while mowing the lawn except think).  I began wondering why we let the backyard lawn get to this point.  We certainly never allow our front yard to be knee high in length with weeds growing wild.  Although on occasion the front yard may be a little overdue for mowing, it never comes close to looking like a cross between a jungle and an abandoned field.  Why is this? It didn’t take long for me to come up for many reasons:

• We would not want to suffer the embarrassment (shame?) of having others see our unkempt yard
• We would not want others to “talk about” us or think badly of us
• We would not want our neighbors to be unhappy or frustrated or wish we would move
• We would not want to get fined (even though our home owners association would require it to get really really bad and give us several warnings before they fined us)

Thus the front yard is regularly mowed and maintained while the backyard at times is left alone to become ugly and unusable. Isn’t that often times just like our own lives?  We  want to “look good” on the outside where others can see and yet in the “backyard” of our hearts we are letting things get out of control and wild.

Truly everything we do to mess up our lives, hurt others or sin against God….begins in our hearts & minds.  Before we ever perform an action that destroys ourselves or our relationship with others or God…we have thought about doing it and instead of regularly maintaining our thought life and our heart attitudes we spend most of our time trying to look good to others.  Whether it is looking good by ….

• obtaining “things” like houses, cars or other “toys”
• having the right physical shape and wearing chic styles
• going to the top college, obtaining degrees or having a great job
• being in a position of influence, power and authority
• having perfectly dressed children who are involved in all the latest and greatest activities or sports
• going to church every Sunday
• volunteering your time and giving your money to charity
• and the list goes on….

Now just like having and taking care of your “front yard” – these pursuits and accomplishments are not bad in themselves but if the “backyard” -our hearts and minds  – are filled with thoughts and attitudes that are “ugly” (bad, wrong, sinful, evil)  then what have we really gained?  We may have fooled everyone around us with our fabulous outward appearance but we cannot fool God.

“For God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”   1 Samuel 16:7

We may “have it all” or at least attempt to “have it all”  in this life….but will we lose out in the end?

“For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world, and forfeit his soul ?”  Mark 8:36

While we may be able to look good on the outside, God knows our hearts and in the end we will answer to Him.  We need to spend time maintaining our hearts and minds with regular care. We can do this by bringing them under the control of God through prayer, confession, reading and obeying the Word.  And it would probably help if we regularly let others into the “backyard” of our hearts and minds as a motivation and accountability to keep things under control.

Let me begin by being vulnerable myself and  invite you into my backyard today and share with you some of my heart attitudes and thoughts that I need to get under control -

• impatience
• pride
• coveting
• gluttony

These are all things that I need to confess and give over to the Lord as well as turning from by practicing patience, humility, contentedness and self control.

Perhaps we all might spend a little bit more time working in  and concentrating on developing the backyard in our lives.  The benefits would truly be life changing and eternal.

Wow….who knew how cathartic mowing the lawn could be?

I grew up in a family who ate dinner together….

at the table…

with the TV turned OFF…

every night…

at 6pm. 

My Mom and Dad raised four children who were active, healthy, drug, alcohol & tobacco free, high academic achievers, student leaders with solid moral standards and a strong Christian faith.  Now while I don’t think that eating dinner together regularly guarantees you parenting success, the statistics are pretty convincing that this sacred ritual is something worth making a priority in our homes.

Research by The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University consistently finds the more often children eat dinner with their families:

• The less likely they are to smoke, drink or use illegal drugs  (100 – 191% less likely)
• The less likely they are to have sex at young ages
• They are at lower risk for thoughts of suicide and depression
• They are more emotionally content and have fewer behavior problems
• They have healthier eating habits
• They do better in school  (academic performance went up 38%)
• They are more likely to talk to their parents about a problem (40% more likely)

 And yet even with all these powerfully convincing statistics – I have found that many of my friends simply can’t seem to make it happen for their families.  We do live in a different world than the 60’s & 70’s when my parents were raising their family.  So many things have changed and there are so many challenges as well as activities “eating up” our time.

• Many families have two working parents and are exhausted at the days end and trying to get a meal on the table and sit down together is overwhelming (I wrote a post last fall that might help this challenge – you can read it here)
• Many families are split up – putting an amazing amount of pressure on the single parent as well as often times having the children going back & forth between two households
• Many parents are working “odd” shifts” – swing shift or graveyard making it hard to share a meal together
• Many children are involved in after school activities, clubs, sports, church youth groups etc… (and parents are transporting them to these activities, coaching or chaperoning) often making it a logistical nightmare trying to get everyone together
• Even the parents have a long list of volunteer activities, book clubs, ladies & guys nights out, Bible studies and even home based businesses that take up night time hours

And yet…I believe if we really want to make it happen we can and we will!

This fall is especially challenging in the Lambdin household as we have three girls playing on soccer teams with varying practice schedules each weekday in the late afternoon/early evening, the high school girls are on the school volleyball team coached by their Daddy and that carload does not walk through the door before 6pm.  The first time we are actually all in the house consistently each evening is at 8pm.  Now that might work in a family without little ones….but my two year old is simply not going to wait to eat dinner that late (besides my metabolism won’t work as well eating a full meal at 8pm). 

As I began to work on our fall calendar this past weekend and realized our current dilemma I began to feel a bit frustrated that our schedules at this season of life are so complicated (you mommy’s of wee ones – be thankful for the less complicated season – hard, yes – but scheduling logistics, much simpler!).  I immediately began to brainstorm our options that would still give us time to sit down & take in a meal together -

• 8pm dinners - NO,  for the reasons stated above
• Give it up and just settle for dinner together on the weekends - NO, I am not the “settling” type of gal
• Have a family breakfast together instead – NO, this would have to happen at 6:30am which means the high school girls & Dan would have to get up 30 minutes earlier than they already do, I would have to get up really early to prepare and mornings are not my best friend, not too mention dragging the 2 year old & 6 year olds out of bed would be a disaster

That is when I came up with this idea.   I will have dinner ready & out in the kitchen for the family to grab and eat from 4:30pm – 6:30pm.  Crock pot type meals that can stay warm and be ready to eat when needed.  (I welcome crock pot recipees – do share!) Paper plates or bowls for easy self clean up. They can eat at the table, at the desk doing homework, in the kitchen or while watching a DVD. They can eat by themselves or with whomever is around at their personal dinner time.  Then around 8pm every night we will all sit around the set table, candles lit, dinner music playing and have a light snack together with coffee or hot tea.  We will alternate between fruit & nuts, cheese/dips & crackers, light appetizers and desserts.  We will offer our prayers & blessing on the food, share stories of the day and enjoy sweet fellowship with the family.

We began last night as this is our first week of the craziness of our fall schedule and will continue this routine Monday through Thursdays (yay for weekend dinners together at 6pm!) until mid November when soccer and volleyball come to an end.  It was a perfect solution and everyone loved it!

Let me encourage you to make taking in a family meal together a real priority! (at the table, with the TV off  –> nice dishes, candles & music are a bonus!) If it helps even a little to keep your kids healthy, off drugs, not depressed, academic achievers with fewer behavior problems as well as more likely to talk to you – it is worth the effort…don’t you think?  Besides it is so enjoyable to spend time with those you love and the memories are priceless!

  Yes….where there is a will…there is a way!

I received much feedback from my previous post – Living life at both ends of the spectrum – it is always good to be reminded of the importance of our loved ones and in the midst of our busyness in life hopefully those reminders cause us to stop, reevaluate and take the time to love, cherish and enjoy the most important people in our lives.

I received one email that really touched me and I just had to share with you all what Crystal from Maine had to say from her current life perspective:

“I am presently at the other end of this spectrum – caring for my dad at home at the end of his wonderful life, as a loving husband, & wonderful father. I wouldn’t trade this moment for anything, no matter how hard it has been. One last smile…..one last “I Love you” or  “God Bless You”.

Hospice has been a blessing, but the faith in our Lord Jesus as he comforts us, in our sadness, and grief, is where its really at. It’s been 3 weeks since he came home from the hospital, and as a nurse, I know his time is coming near. I just felt the need to respond to your post I just got in my email and I as a fellow CM scrapbooker,I too want to share this picture, my sister took and I created.”

So while we remember that life with our little ones is fleeting and will soon give way to them leaving home…let’s also be reminded of our older loved ones who will all too quickly pass from this life to the next and all we will have left is our memories of time spent with them. Take the time today to let them know you love them and cherish the time you have to spend together. (and take it from someone who lives 3000 miles away from her Mommy – if you live close…take advantage of that and make the most of every opportunity!)

UPDATE: Please read the comments below for a message from Crystal about her Dad going home to be with the Lord yesterday.

As I type this I am watching a pretty wild and rambunctious pillow fight taking place on my bed.  The toddler and the six year old are going at it with gusto, as I protect the baby girl from their flailing arms. The computer is bouncing up and down, I just got a foot in my face and I am about to ban them from my bedroom…

….but I stop myself because this morning I have a fresh awareness that these moments are fleeting and will all too soon give way to the solitude that comes with grown up children and an “empty nest”.  I decide to stop wishing for some peace and quiet and just take it all in.  Perhaps I have an advantage that other moms with hyped up, super energetic young ones don’t have – after all how many mothers of wee ones just drove their eldest child to the airport to wave goodbye as she went off to her second year of college?  How many have a baby wrapping her fingers tightly around their thumb while not wanting to let go of the hand of  their  adult child? How many mommy’s are living both ends of the spectrum at once? Yes, that is one of the advantages of having children over a span of two decades…perspective.

I know many of my friends are at the tail end of their parenting years. They have two or perhaps three children all close in age who one by one are headed out the door leaving an emptiness, strange quietness and hole in their hearts along with the question…”Where did the time go?”  They long to go back in time to the days when their children were young and all under their roof.

I also have several friends with many little ones clinging to their knees who would love a moment of peace and quiet or would pay big money just to have time alone.  They think that this season will never end where they often cannnot even get in a shower, rarely hold an adult conversation and are always exhausted from the never ending job of being a Mom.

What I want to say to those about to have a completely empty nest – embrace this new season of life.  Be the best parent to your adult children that you can be.  Spend time praying for them.  Finish that scrapbook you started when they were babies (or that you thought about starting).  Be encouraging & uplifting – supporting their decisions and giving wisdom and advice when you are asked (they likely won’t listen to you anyway if you give it before they ask). Use your new free time to make a positive difference in the world and impact those around you.  Remember all those things you wished you could do when the kids were little?  Do them! (hmmm or here is an option – you could always adopt a child and begin again!)

And to those stressed out, overworked, about to go crazy mommy’s of little ones, I want to say –  Don’t wish it away.  Enjoy this season.  Relax. Let things go and don’t be so uptight.  So what if your house is a mess, you have days where you never get dressed, your to do list never gets completely done, your children are not perfectly “coiffed” or you just can’t seem to keep it all together.  It is ok. Make memories with your children. Love them and enjoy them at every stage -

• Snuggle that newborn in your neck, rock them to sleep, smell their amazing aroma, stare in wonder at their fingers & toes
• Watch your infant sleep peacefully – breathe in & out in their rythm, tickle their tummies and take in that unbridled laughter, spend hours looking into their pure eyes and trying to make them smile
• Play with your toddler, get on the floor and crawl around in the dirt with them, explore with them all the things that catch their attention
• Laugh at the temper tantrums, sing “Fits are the pits”, “I’m allergic to griping” or some other song when inappropriate behavior pops up (discipline can be fun too…for you anyway – I could actually put on make up or eat a cookie with my coffee during time outs!)
• 
• Read with your children – even if it is the same book over & over. Teach them to read. Tell them stories. Lay in bed with them & let them come in bed with you
• Let them have pillow fights, horse play and jump on the bed . Squirt whip cream right into their mouths, be spontaneous and fun – it is ok….no it is great to let them run in the rain, get muddy,  jump in puddles, climb trees, go swimming in the winter, skip school for a day, eat pie for breakfast. (my list goes on & on – as long as it is legal & moral)
• 
• Blow bubbles with them, swing together, have tea parties, play games, turn up the music loud & sing together, dance with them , laugh with them and cry with them.
• Go to their games, school events, productions, activities and concerts.  Cheer wildly. Take pictures.
• Let your teenagers sleep in, be respectfully opinionated and even occasionally roll their eyes (in fact have an eye rolling competition! I win every time!) Walk away and do not engage when they are “having one of those days”.
• Open your home and heart to their friends, take an interest in their passions and pursuits.
• Kiss them good morning, good bye & goodnight. Be generous with your affection and tell them you love them at every opportunity
• 

Whatever season of parenting you are in – make the most of every moment, celebrate everything and enjoy the precious gifts of life you have been blessed with - your children.

This past Sunday was a very special day.

 We dedicated our dear Christiana to the Lord during the Sunday morning service at our church. As our entire family stood along with our pastor and his wife before our church family and dedicated this newest blessing back to the God who gave her to us I was overcome with emotion on many levels.

 I was filled with joy that God has chosen to bless us with this precious life.

I was filled with love for Christiana, my amazing husband, my beautiful children, my extended family, my pastors and my church family.

 I was filled with peace knowing that this child belongs to the Lord and that He is in control of her life.

 I was filled with hope, awe & wonder at the knowledge that God has a very special and unique plan for her life and that she will certainly be called by God to do great & mighty things for His kingdom.

 As I stood there and looked out on the congregation, it hit me that 20 years ago in 1989 we had brought our first born daughter, Michelle to that very same altar, at that very same church and dedicated her to the Lord. Over the past two decades, everyone of our eight children has been dedicated to the Lord at this same altar.

 It also hit me that this is a rarity in our modern day mobile society where for one reason or another folks seem to switch churches every few years.

 I officially joined this church 26 years ago as a single young college student who after spending the summer as their youth intern decided that I wanted to become a part of this church family. My now husband, Dan became an official member after he decided to commit to being a part of the volunteer youth staff almost 25 years ago.

 One of the benefits of staying put over all these years is that many of our important spiritual milestones have taken place within those church walls and with our church family.

•  Dan proposed to me at the altar at the conclusion of our youth service on March 18, 1986 (and I said yes!)
• We were given counseling and married by the staff of this church and held our wedding reception in that very same sanctuary.
• We served on staff as youth pastors of our church for four years.
• Besides all of our children being dedicated to the Lord at that altar – one was saved during a children’s puppet crusade there (all the others prayed to receive Christ at home other than one who happened to be at a local gas station), three have been baptized in water at the church, four have been crowned an honor star through the outstanding girls ministry of Missionettes and two have held their Rite of Passage ceremony in the chapel.
• We have sat in the same section in the front left hand side faithfully every Sunday and worshipped together, prayed together, given offerings together, been convicted, inspired, amused and yes even sometimes put to sleep, by the messages, gone to the altar for prayer and ministered to others all in that sanctuary.
• We have taught Sunday School, worked in the nursery, volunteered in children’s ministry, attended special events, rejoiced along with dozens of young couples as they were wed, watched multitudes of baby dedications, baptisms and celebrated the lives of precious saints who went home to be with the Lord…all in that very same building.

 Now perhaps you might be thinking, that we found the perfect church since we have stayed and remained faithful all these years.   The messages must always be compelling, funny and interesting. The programs must be comprehensive and state of the art with something for everyone from infants to senior citizens. The music must be perfect and pleasing to everyone. The pastor and staff must be kind, compassionate, forgiving, wise, moral, charismatic, friendly, organized, effective communicators, dynamic leaders, ready to drop everything when you need them and willing to go the extra mile. The people there must be wonderful, supporting, encouraging, loving, serving one another – never gossiping, backbiting, complaining, grumbling  or…..

 …..oh wait – are you laughing yet?

 No, my home church is just like every church I know – full of imperfections, flaws, problems and frustrations.

 We have had some very amazing and awesome times at our church and we have had some very troubling and terrible times as well.  There has even been the “in between” rather dull and boring years with not much happening at all. We have seen hundreds if not thousands of lives dramatically impacted and we have seen people hurt and become bitter and angry.  We have gone through three pastors, five children’s pastors, six worship leaders and seven youth pastors. We have experienced an abundance of resources as well as times where we did not know if we would be able to turn on the lights the next Sunday.  We have had seasons of favor in the community and years marked with scandal.  We have seen people come and people go (and even come back again several times)  We have seen them trickle out because they were unhappy with this or that or because they were searching for better preaching or programs and we have seen them leave in droves because of some controversy, offense, disagreement or because of the latest and greatest new church starting up across town.

 And yet through it all….we have stayed.

 Why??? I am glad you asked.

We have stayed because we see commitment to our local church family the same way we see our commitment to our marriage and family.  We have made the commitment for the “long haul” – in good times and bad, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health and hopefully until death do us part.

Now of course their could be legitimate reasons to leave a church – like moving miles away, being called to minister to another congregation, if the church was to start heretical preaching (I’ll call this church adultery since they are forsaking the true Jesus – I might not leave for this but rather stay and fight but I do understand those that do leave for heresy)  or if their is abuse going on from leadership (one of the reasons I have chosen to stay in a church denomination that has a governing body over the local church that can intervene when leadership goes awry – non denominational churches lack such accountability) – but unfortunately the vast majority of people who leave a church do so, not for the reasons stated above, but because they:

• are unhappy, frustrated or bored with the services, teaching or music
• are not “getting fed” (ie – want the preaching to be dynamic, motivating and challenging)
• want a better nursery, children’s or youth services, Sunday school or other program they deem vital
• are angry at some church decision, the leadership or policies
• things are not new & exciting enough
• someone has ticked them off, offended, hurt or sinned against them

Now, I don’t know about you but I would not leave my marriage or trade in my family for any of those reasons.  Yes, there are times I am unhappy, bored, angry, hurt, frustrated and not very content with both my marriage and my family. Yes, there are times I want change or feel the need to have something new & exciting but that does not cause me to run off with a new guy or leave my children. And of course on occasion I long for a bigger house equipped with the all the” bells & whistles” and yet that is not what makes a house a home it is my family and our years of memories together that are the most important.

Since the Bible compares Christ and His commitment and love for His church to marriage and how it should operate – I think that we should all more seriously consider our commitment to the church as well.

Maybe it is time to stop church hopping. Maybe it’s time to make a commitment to a body of believers and stick with it.  Maybe it’s time to:

• pray during service if your unhappy or frustrated (or look for someone to minister to)
• feed yourself! (one of my biggest pet peeves is when adult Christians say “ I am not getting fed”. Really? Grow up & feed yourself)
• volunteer to make your church programs better or realize that perfect programs are really not that vital compared to what you are teaching your children about commitment & faithfulness by sticking it out through the good, bad & the ugly
• graciously and humbly communicate with your church leadership when you are concerned or have problems and at the same time let them know that you will not leave if things don’t change or go your way
• trust God that He is using the leadership of your church in your life for good even if they make wrong decisions or policies
• forgive those church members who sin against you (definition of forgiveness here – throw it in the sea of forgetfulness and remember it no more – you know – like what Jesus has promised to do for you…whew!)
• remember that “new & exciting” is fun while it lasts….but it always, always, always ends up being old & routine. (so start seeing that as solid, secure, consistent and faithful)
• “get over it” and realize that there is no perfect church – expect that you will at times be unhappy, frustrated, hurt and offended and enjoy the other times when you are thrilled, excited, amazed, touched, loved and blessed. Just like it is at home.

I believe that we have been blessed beyond measure by making such a unshakable commitment to our local church.  I also believe that the Lord is pleased that we have chosen faithfulness, commitment, forgiveness, long suffering and love over taking the easy way and “jumping ship” when we were unhappy, offended or discontent.

My one regret is that there are only a handful of others in our church who also chose to have that same type of commitment.  Oh how I would have loved to look out at that congregation on Sunday and seen the hundreds of church family members who were there when I became a member in September of 1983, who celebrated with us as we were married in 1986, who were there to commit to helping us raise our children up in the Lord as we brought each one of them to the altar and who played with them in the nursery, taught their Sunday School classes and led their Missionette clubs . Instead most of those folks are scattered throughout churches in our county, yes serving the Lord and yes still part of the greater body of Christ and while we have done our best to stay connected it is just not the same. We have all missed out on the joy, love and blessings of being an intimate “forever church family” while here on earth.

I hope and pray that my children as they grow up and settle down wherever the Lord leads them that they will find a church family that they will commit to and that they will be blessed to have members with that same commitment.  Does that exist anymore? I believe it can if we each just start today with our own decision to commit to our church family…..forever.

To say that I don’t have time right now is like saying that Bill Gates just has a little extra “walking around money”. Yes that would be an understatement.

Besides the regular routine of  mothering, homeschooling, household management, my home based business and my “part time” job (yada yada)… I am working ’round the clock on the annual Jim Elliot Christian High School Dinner Auction which is just over a week away (and I still need to sell 150 tickets..yikes, gather up last minute auction donations and work daily with my team of volunteers).  Add to that my homeschoolers have state testing this week, not having gone to bed before 2am in days and having kids going “down for the count” daily with the stomach flu…and yes extra time is just about non existent in my life right now.

Yet today despite all of this…I managed to throw on some red, white & blue, grab some flags out of the closet and drive downtown to City Hall for a 45 minute rally at our Stockton City Tea Party.

Why did I stop in the midst of the craziness of my current life to attend a rally where no one was expecting me or perhaps it didn’t even matter if I was there?  Why did I overcome my own personal objections of weariness, busyness and other obligations?  WHY?  WHY? WHY?

• Because I believe in the message!
• Because I am role modeling for and training my children.  They are watching and listening to not just what I say….but what I do.
• Because in the future when I am asked – “Why did you not try to do something to stop this mess?”  I will be able to with a clear conscience say – I did do something!

There is so much more that I could say about how sometimes we just need to throw out our excuses as to why we can’t do something….and just do it! (but I will just let me actions speak for me this time)

Life went on today….even though I spent 45 minutes at a rally letting my voice be heard and then another 45 minutes sharing that with you in this blog! And no one may ever remember that I let my voice be heard today, but I will lay my head on the pillow tonight with perfect peace that I have stood for what I believe in, have role modeled that to my children and have began the fight for our future generation who will have to bear the brunt of our current actions. 

Is there something in your life that you say you believe in and that you just are not making the time to do? Or perhaps you really do not have the time? So what….just do it! (This is what I said to myself this morning as I contemplated “skipping out” on this event and listed all the reasons I just didn’t have the time)