Ok, so we don’t “do” Halloween…

Now before you get all stressed out that I am depriving my kids of fun (or candy) I am just a “stick in the mud” or that I am somehow condemning or judging those who do choose to observe Halloween…take a deep breath & RELAX.

1. I really have no opinion on those who observe Halloween in any way they choose (with the exception of doing evil or immoral activities that harm others).  Dress up, don’t dress up. Go to a Halloween party or don’t go to a party.  Call it a fall festival or Trunk or Treat…I have no comments or judgements at all….really!  It is just something that we have chosen to basically ignore as part of our family life.
2. Do not worry that my kids feel deprived or like they have missed out on something special.  Those that know us well…know that the Lambdin household is one ongoing party and that there are multitudes of opportunities for fun!  We dress up many times throughout the year (Daniel has been a cowboy for a month) and in fact we have half of a closet completely devoted to dress up clothes.  There is also plenty of good eating going on in this house (too much if you judge it by my waistline) We even watch “It’s the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown”.
3. I love the fall season – our house is fun & festive with decorations, we eat yummy soups, breads & baked goodies like pies, apple & pumpkin dump cakes, cookies, popcorn balls & more!  We go to Apple Hill & the Pumpkin Patch for special family outings.   Since a “picture paints a thousand words” – look at the fun – these kids don’t look deprived!

Ok, maybe I am a “stick in the mud” for wanting to pass on the stress, cost, time & work of arranging costumes & schedules (I can see how costuming can be fun I just need my creative juices for other endeavours), the temptation and rules to enforce that come with  having WAY too much candy in my home the week after Halloween, fighting the crowds at the church festivals & trying to keep track of my little ones & play games while really wanting to just chat with the adults there, passing out candy to kids with fake blood coming out of their mouths (although I love seeing the cute costumes!) or those who look like they are in their late teens & not even in a costume (or maybe it was a “gang banger” costume)…to name a few of the things I get to avoid by just not participating.

And for those inquiring minds, yes  Dan and I do have personal ideological views on Halloween that have been the foundation of why we choose to ignore this particular holiday. (and I am more than willing to share that with you if you are interested)  How we observe Halloween is just like most Christians observe religious holidays like Ramadan,   Yom Kippur, Vesak or Maha Sivaratri, they simply are not a part of their family life. Or you could compare it to how most Americans do not celebrate other countries national holidays (nor do they even know them for the most part). Halloween is just a another day in our home.

That said…I do feel most people do not know much about Halloween other than the basic – dress up in costumes, trick or treat, or adult Halloween parties. (by the way when did Halloween become such a HUGE adult thing??….back in “the day” it was mostly a kid holiday with a few side adult features…not so much anymore…but I digress) 

Halloween, which should be correctly said as “All Hallows Eve” is the night before All Saints Day, an important day to Christian Catholics, when they pray for those who have passed on from this life. (like Christmas Eve is the night before Christmas day, All Hallows Eve is the night before All Saints Day). For Christian Protestants today is Reformation Day. The Reformation began on October 31, 1517, when German monk Martin Luther nailed his 95 Theses to the Castle Church door in Wittenberg, Germany. This was one of the most influential events of the past 1,000 years.

Martin Luther made a translation of the Bible from Greek and Hebrew into German. Soon all the countries of Europe followed his example by translating the Scriptures into their languages. For the first time in history, the recently invented printing press made the Word of God available to all the people.

So….

•  to my Christian Catholic friends…Blessed All Hallows Eve & All Saints Day!
• to my Christian Protestant friends…Blessed Reformation Day!
• and to all Christians (especially those of us who enjoy living in free countries) may you celebrate with great thanksgiving the fact that the Word of God is in print and as close as your bookshelf, bedroom or computer and that you can read it anytime you choose.  Why not take some time to open up that life changing book and do some reading today and everyday?

I so wish that I could have been in Washington DC for the 9/12 March yesterday.  In fact just last Sunday I was looking at airline tickets and trying to figure out a way to come up with the money to fly out there. In case you are unaware of what the 9/12 March was…let me give you the 411.  The march yesterday which drew tens of thousands of people (some estimate 2 million) from all across America was a gathering of people from every walk of life, every race, every creed, every political and non political party who wanted to express their desire to see America return to 9 basic principles and 12 values. 

Here are the 9 principles:

1.  America is good
2. I believe in God and He is the center of my life
    ”The propitious smiles of Heaven can never be expected on a nation that disregards the eternal rules of order and right which Heaven itself has ordained.” from George Washington´s first Inaugural address.
3.   I must always try to be a more honest person than I was yesterday.
   “I hope that I shall always possess firmness and virtue enough to maintain what I consider to be the most enviable of all titles, the character of an honest man.” George Washington
4. The family is sacred. My spouse and I are the ultimate authority, not the government.
   “It is in the love of one´s family only that heartfelt happiness is known. By a law of our nature, we cannot be happy without the endearing connections of a family.” Thomas Jefferson
5. If you break the law you pay the penalty. Justice is blind and no one is above it.
     “I deem one of the essential principles of our government… equal and exact justice to all men of whatever state or persuasion, religious or political.” Thomas Jefferson
6.  I have a right to life, liberty and pursuit of happiness, but there is no guarantee of equal results.
   “Everyone has a natural right to choose that vocation in life which he thinks most likely to give him comfortable subsistence.” Thomas Jefferson
7. I work hard for what I have and I will share it with who I want to. Government cannot force me to be charitable.
    “It is not everyone who asketh that deserveth charity; all however, are worth of the inquiry or the deserving may suffer.” George Washington
8. It is not un-American for me to disagree with authority or to share my personal opinion.
    “In a free and republican government, you cannot restrain the voice of the multitude; every man will speak as he thinks, or more properly without thinking.” George Washington
9.  The government works for me. I do not answer to them, they answer to me.
    ”I consider the people who constitute a society or a nation as the source of all authority in that nation.” Thomas Jefferson

Here are the 12 values:

• Honesty
• Reverence
•  Hope
• Thrift
• Humility
• Charity
• Sincerity
• Moderation
• Hard Work
• Courage
• Personal Responsibility
• Gratitude

And yes they were there to protest – the current healthcare reform, the increase in government spending and trillion dollar deficit, tax increases, wealth redistribution to name a few. Here is a great slide show from a blogger friend of mine was there so you can see it for yourself  -http://picasaweb.google.com/BarbarasMommyLife/912MarchOnWashingtonDC?feat=embedwebsite#

These values & principles as well as protests combined with my pro-life/anti-abortion (let me be clear with the facts of science – abortion is the killing of a baby and should not happen in any society – there is an answer to unwanted babies it is called adoption) passion is what I am (or striving to be as I certainly have not arrived in several of these areas).

 During the past several months many of our leaders and media have classified people like me who have attended marches, tea parties, town hall meetings or protests in very unbecoming and untrue way. 

I am not:

• a Nazi  — I have never been nor will ever embrace socialism, white supremacy, anti-Semitism or fascism
• a racist — I do not see color or race but rather as Martin Luther King hoped for, I judge people on the content of their character.  I have very close friends of most every race – African American, Filipino, Mexican, South American, Korean. Oh and did I mention I have a precious & perfect baby girl who happens to be black that we adopted here in the USA?
• un American — I am a proud & patriotic American, raised in a third generation military family with both of my grandfathers serving in WWII (and one giving his life there).  I have voted in every election since I turned 18, proudly fly the American flag daily and participated in the celebration of our country, our national holidays and the democratic process my entire life.
• astroturf – this new name given to those protesting who are supposedly being paid to go protest by some big organization or corporation. Ummmm…no one has paid this lady a dime, nor recruited me let alone even talked to me. And FYI…I do not watch Fox news (have only had television reception since last Thursday), have never listened to Glen Beck (although I would love to) and catch perhaps a grand total of 1 hour per week of conservative talk radio while I am in the car driving my kids to all their actvities. 
• a homeland terrorist - I have never ever been involved in acts of violence or coercion against America or anyone for that matter and just because I am pro life, against illegal immigration, believe in state & local authority  and  am conservative I am going to be labeled a terrorist?
• “fishy” - simply by having legitimate concerns about the current healthcare reform bill and sharing those concerns with others makes me suspicious…hmmmm.
• a “tea bagger” – I am too classy to even respond to this base name calling by our media
• a moron  – some refered to yesterdays demonstration as the “Million Moron March”  So now I am being called a moron.  (I was there in spirit if not in flesh) I do not claim to be the brightest individual in the world but I am not stupid (the technical definition is an adult with the mental age of 8-12) and in fact graduated in the top 12 of my high school class (albeit in the California public schools), scored a 1200 on my SAT’s and earned a college degree from UOP.

Ok, I just thought I’d clear that up for everyone..although I doubt that the people who called me those names are reading my blog!  I will be at the next march and despite my very full life (ummm….8 children, homeschooling Mom, Director of Development for JECHS, Creative Memories Consultant and trying to do something to promote adoption) I will be campaigning for new congressmen & new senators that reflect what I am.

September 11, 2001

I was actually in the Washington DC area on a business trip on that fateful day in American history, along with my then seven year old daughter, Kristen. (she is now 15!) We were getting ready to fly home on that very same morning those planes were flown into the twin towers. 

Here is an excerpt from my photo album (I am so thankful that I took the time to write this down back then!)  -

From the moment I turned on the television at my mothers home in Springfield, Virginia…everything began to become surreal. I sat frozen alone on the couch as I realized the atrocity and severity of what was happening. Terrorists hijacked  two airplanes and crashed them into the twin towers in New York City. As the events unfolded I watched with horror along with millions of Americans who were glued to their television sets.  It was like we were watching a nightmare and wondering what might happen next and if we would ever feel safe again.

All I could think was that I wanted to be home with my family. I was 3000 miles away and with all air traffic being suspended indefinitely, there was no certainty of when I could get home. I called Dan who was still unaware of what was happening on the East Coast (It was still very early in California). He prayed for me & told me how much he loved me. He also shared how relieved he was that I was at home at my Mom’s and not on an airplane at that moment. As I sat back down to watch the unfolding drama I learned that another plane had crashed just down the freeway from where I currently was – into the Pentagon. I was stunned! What was happening…and what would be next? It was at that point I looked down at my confirmed airline itinerary dated September 11. 2001 from Washington DC to California. The full impact hit me. I easily could have been a passenger on one of those airplanes heading to California. I began to cry & praise the Lord that it was not my time to die and that I was not on an airplane right then being diverted to another city somewhere in the U.S. I was at my mothers home with my sweet daughter. I had a lot to be thankful for that day. We finally did get home four days later. (but not without several delays including getting stuck in Minneapolis for a night and being graciously taken in by a business associate Leanne Anderson) I was so happy to be home with my precious family.

In the aftermath of 911, it was inspiring to see patriotism come to life in America. Everywhere you looked people were wearing red, white & blue, flying flags, putting up signs & showing their love for their country & fellow citizens. Flags were everywhere – on every home, hanging from bridges, on cars, on buildings, on clothing…it was overwhelming & emotional. I found myself with eyes filled with tears and getting choked up several times a day as I witnessed the love of others and the patriotism that had been sorely missing in the daily life of most Americans. People also began to give of their time, talent & treasure in abundance. On every street corner money was being collected & people gave freely. Many volunteered their time and stood in line for hours to give blood. It was an incredible moment in history to witness this outpouring of love & generosity.

This tragedy of 911 also turned many peoples hearts back to the Lord and to faith. Everyone was in desperate search of answers and in great need of peace, hope & security. People were coming together in droves to pray and seek God. Our common faith in God became evident to all. The cross rose up out of the ashes of the towers and became a symbol of hope for those at Ground Zero in New York. We all knew that we desperately needed God. No one was offended by people praying or evoking the name of Jesus. There was a National Memorial Service broadcast worldwide where Billy Graham boldly proclaimed the gospel.

September 11, 2001 was truly a day that changed everything. 

Were you changed by the events of September 11? 

• Did you stop everything & order your priorities aright?
• Did you have a renewed sense of patriotism & love for the USofA?
• Did you weep with those who lost loved ones and hold your precious family closer?
• Did you give blood, donate your time or money in the aftermath?
• Did it draw you to the Lord?

Perhaps on this anniversary of 911 it would do us all some good to recommit to these same things today.  In this ever changing and turbulent times we are living…none of us knows what tomorrow will bring.

Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.  I Peter 5:8

It is so easy in the years following a disaster or life changing event to lose your resolve, be lulled into apathy or even forget the things that you thought would stay with you forever.  Take the time today to remember and recommit yourself to loving God, loving others, loving life and loving our country with the intensity we did after 911.

We here at the Lambdin home…will NEVER forget!

God Bless America!

I grew up in a family who ate dinner together….

at the table…

with the TV turned OFF…

every night…

at 6pm. 

My Mom and Dad raised four children who were active, healthy, drug, alcohol & tobacco free, high academic achievers, student leaders with solid moral standards and a strong Christian faith.  Now while I don’t think that eating dinner together regularly guarantees you parenting success, the statistics are pretty convincing that this sacred ritual is something worth making a priority in our homes.

Research by The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA) at Columbia University consistently finds the more often children eat dinner with their families:

• The less likely they are to smoke, drink or use illegal drugs  (100 – 191% less likely)
• The less likely they are to have sex at young ages
• They are at lower risk for thoughts of suicide and depression
• They are more emotionally content and have fewer behavior problems
• They have healthier eating habits
• They do better in school  (academic performance went up 38%)
• They are more likely to talk to their parents about a problem (40% more likely)

 And yet even with all these powerfully convincing statistics – I have found that many of my friends simply can’t seem to make it happen for their families.  We do live in a different world than the 60’s & 70’s when my parents were raising their family.  So many things have changed and there are so many challenges as well as activities “eating up” our time.

• Many families have two working parents and are exhausted at the days end and trying to get a meal on the table and sit down together is overwhelming (I wrote a post last fall that might help this challenge – you can read it here)
• Many families are split up – putting an amazing amount of pressure on the single parent as well as often times having the children going back & forth between two households
• Many parents are working “odd” shifts” – swing shift or graveyard making it hard to share a meal together
• Many children are involved in after school activities, clubs, sports, church youth groups etc… (and parents are transporting them to these activities, coaching or chaperoning) often making it a logistical nightmare trying to get everyone together
• Even the parents have a long list of volunteer activities, book clubs, ladies & guys nights out, Bible studies and even home based businesses that take up night time hours

And yet…I believe if we really want to make it happen we can and we will!

This fall is especially challenging in the Lambdin household as we have three girls playing on soccer teams with varying practice schedules each weekday in the late afternoon/early evening, the high school girls are on the school volleyball team coached by their Daddy and that carload does not walk through the door before 6pm.  The first time we are actually all in the house consistently each evening is at 8pm.  Now that might work in a family without little ones….but my two year old is simply not going to wait to eat dinner that late (besides my metabolism won’t work as well eating a full meal at 8pm). 

As I began to work on our fall calendar this past weekend and realized our current dilemma I began to feel a bit frustrated that our schedules at this season of life are so complicated (you mommy’s of wee ones – be thankful for the less complicated season – hard, yes – but scheduling logistics, much simpler!).  I immediately began to brainstorm our options that would still give us time to sit down & take in a meal together -

• 8pm dinners - NO,  for the reasons stated above
• Give it up and just settle for dinner together on the weekends - NO, I am not the “settling” type of gal
• Have a family breakfast together instead – NO, this would have to happen at 6:30am which means the high school girls & Dan would have to get up 30 minutes earlier than they already do, I would have to get up really early to prepare and mornings are not my best friend, not too mention dragging the 2 year old & 6 year olds out of bed would be a disaster

That is when I came up with this idea.   I will have dinner ready & out in the kitchen for the family to grab and eat from 4:30pm – 6:30pm.  Crock pot type meals that can stay warm and be ready to eat when needed.  (I welcome crock pot recipees – do share!) Paper plates or bowls for easy self clean up. They can eat at the table, at the desk doing homework, in the kitchen or while watching a DVD. They can eat by themselves or with whomever is around at their personal dinner time.  Then around 8pm every night we will all sit around the set table, candles lit, dinner music playing and have a light snack together with coffee or hot tea.  We will alternate between fruit & nuts, cheese/dips & crackers, light appetizers and desserts.  We will offer our prayers & blessing on the food, share stories of the day and enjoy sweet fellowship with the family.

We began last night as this is our first week of the craziness of our fall schedule and will continue this routine Monday through Thursdays (yay for weekend dinners together at 6pm!) until mid November when soccer and volleyball come to an end.  It was a perfect solution and everyone loved it!

Let me encourage you to make taking in a family meal together a real priority! (at the table, with the TV off  –> nice dishes, candles & music are a bonus!) If it helps even a little to keep your kids healthy, off drugs, not depressed, academic achievers with fewer behavior problems as well as more likely to talk to you – it is worth the effort…don’t you think?  Besides it is so enjoyable to spend time with those you love and the memories are priceless!

  Yes….where there is a will…there is a way!

This past Sunday was a very special day.

 We dedicated our dear Christiana to the Lord during the Sunday morning service at our church. As our entire family stood along with our pastor and his wife before our church family and dedicated this newest blessing back to the God who gave her to us I was overcome with emotion on many levels.

 I was filled with joy that God has chosen to bless us with this precious life.

I was filled with love for Christiana, my amazing husband, my beautiful children, my extended family, my pastors and my church family.

 I was filled with peace knowing that this child belongs to the Lord and that He is in control of her life.

 I was filled with hope, awe & wonder at the knowledge that God has a very special and unique plan for her life and that she will certainly be called by God to do great & mighty things for His kingdom.

 As I stood there and looked out on the congregation, it hit me that 20 years ago in 1989 we had brought our first born daughter, Michelle to that very same altar, at that very same church and dedicated her to the Lord. Over the past two decades, everyone of our eight children has been dedicated to the Lord at this same altar.

 It also hit me that this is a rarity in our modern day mobile society where for one reason or another folks seem to switch churches every few years.

 I officially joined this church 26 years ago as a single young college student who after spending the summer as their youth intern decided that I wanted to become a part of this church family. My now husband, Dan became an official member after he decided to commit to being a part of the volunteer youth staff almost 25 years ago.

 One of the benefits of staying put over all these years is that many of our important spiritual milestones have taken place within those church walls and with our church family.

•  Dan proposed to me at the altar at the conclusion of our youth service on March 18, 1986 (and I said yes!)
• We were given counseling and married by the staff of this church and held our wedding reception in that very same sanctuary.
• We served on staff as youth pastors of our church for four years.
• Besides all of our children being dedicated to the Lord at that altar – one was saved during a children’s puppet crusade there (all the others prayed to receive Christ at home other than one who happened to be at a local gas station), three have been baptized in water at the church, four have been crowned an honor star through the outstanding girls ministry of Missionettes and two have held their Rite of Passage ceremony in the chapel.
• We have sat in the same section in the front left hand side faithfully every Sunday and worshipped together, prayed together, given offerings together, been convicted, inspired, amused and yes even sometimes put to sleep, by the messages, gone to the altar for prayer and ministered to others all in that sanctuary.
• We have taught Sunday School, worked in the nursery, volunteered in children’s ministry, attended special events, rejoiced along with dozens of young couples as they were wed, watched multitudes of baby dedications, baptisms and celebrated the lives of precious saints who went home to be with the Lord…all in that very same building.

 Now perhaps you might be thinking, that we found the perfect church since we have stayed and remained faithful all these years.   The messages must always be compelling, funny and interesting. The programs must be comprehensive and state of the art with something for everyone from infants to senior citizens. The music must be perfect and pleasing to everyone. The pastor and staff must be kind, compassionate, forgiving, wise, moral, charismatic, friendly, organized, effective communicators, dynamic leaders, ready to drop everything when you need them and willing to go the extra mile. The people there must be wonderful, supporting, encouraging, loving, serving one another – never gossiping, backbiting, complaining, grumbling  or…..

 …..oh wait – are you laughing yet?

 No, my home church is just like every church I know – full of imperfections, flaws, problems and frustrations.

 We have had some very amazing and awesome times at our church and we have had some very troubling and terrible times as well.  There has even been the “in between” rather dull and boring years with not much happening at all. We have seen hundreds if not thousands of lives dramatically impacted and we have seen people hurt and become bitter and angry.  We have gone through three pastors, five children’s pastors, six worship leaders and seven youth pastors. We have experienced an abundance of resources as well as times where we did not know if we would be able to turn on the lights the next Sunday.  We have had seasons of favor in the community and years marked with scandal.  We have seen people come and people go (and even come back again several times)  We have seen them trickle out because they were unhappy with this or that or because they were searching for better preaching or programs and we have seen them leave in droves because of some controversy, offense, disagreement or because of the latest and greatest new church starting up across town.

 And yet through it all….we have stayed.

 Why??? I am glad you asked.

We have stayed because we see commitment to our local church family the same way we see our commitment to our marriage and family.  We have made the commitment for the “long haul” – in good times and bad, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health and hopefully until death do us part.

Now of course their could be legitimate reasons to leave a church – like moving miles away, being called to minister to another congregation, if the church was to start heretical preaching (I’ll call this church adultery since they are forsaking the true Jesus – I might not leave for this but rather stay and fight but I do understand those that do leave for heresy)  or if their is abuse going on from leadership (one of the reasons I have chosen to stay in a church denomination that has a governing body over the local church that can intervene when leadership goes awry – non denominational churches lack such accountability) – but unfortunately the vast majority of people who leave a church do so, not for the reasons stated above, but because they:

• are unhappy, frustrated or bored with the services, teaching or music
• are not “getting fed” (ie – want the preaching to be dynamic, motivating and challenging)
• want a better nursery, children’s or youth services, Sunday school or other program they deem vital
• are angry at some church decision, the leadership or policies
• things are not new & exciting enough
• someone has ticked them off, offended, hurt or sinned against them

Now, I don’t know about you but I would not leave my marriage or trade in my family for any of those reasons.  Yes, there are times I am unhappy, bored, angry, hurt, frustrated and not very content with both my marriage and my family. Yes, there are times I want change or feel the need to have something new & exciting but that does not cause me to run off with a new guy or leave my children. And of course on occasion I long for a bigger house equipped with the all the” bells & whistles” and yet that is not what makes a house a home it is my family and our years of memories together that are the most important.

Since the Bible compares Christ and His commitment and love for His church to marriage and how it should operate – I think that we should all more seriously consider our commitment to the church as well.

Maybe it is time to stop church hopping. Maybe it’s time to make a commitment to a body of believers and stick with it.  Maybe it’s time to:

• pray during service if your unhappy or frustrated (or look for someone to minister to)
• feed yourself! (one of my biggest pet peeves is when adult Christians say “ I am not getting fed”. Really? Grow up & feed yourself)
• volunteer to make your church programs better or realize that perfect programs are really not that vital compared to what you are teaching your children about commitment & faithfulness by sticking it out through the good, bad & the ugly
• graciously and humbly communicate with your church leadership when you are concerned or have problems and at the same time let them know that you will not leave if things don’t change or go your way
• trust God that He is using the leadership of your church in your life for good even if they make wrong decisions or policies
• forgive those church members who sin against you (definition of forgiveness here – throw it in the sea of forgetfulness and remember it no more – you know – like what Jesus has promised to do for you…whew!)
• remember that “new & exciting” is fun while it lasts….but it always, always, always ends up being old & routine. (so start seeing that as solid, secure, consistent and faithful)
• “get over it” and realize that there is no perfect church – expect that you will at times be unhappy, frustrated, hurt and offended and enjoy the other times when you are thrilled, excited, amazed, touched, loved and blessed. Just like it is at home.

I believe that we have been blessed beyond measure by making such a unshakable commitment to our local church.  I also believe that the Lord is pleased that we have chosen faithfulness, commitment, forgiveness, long suffering and love over taking the easy way and “jumping ship” when we were unhappy, offended or discontent.

My one regret is that there are only a handful of others in our church who also chose to have that same type of commitment.  Oh how I would have loved to look out at that congregation on Sunday and seen the hundreds of church family members who were there when I became a member in September of 1983, who celebrated with us as we were married in 1986, who were there to commit to helping us raise our children up in the Lord as we brought each one of them to the altar and who played with them in the nursery, taught their Sunday School classes and led their Missionette clubs . Instead most of those folks are scattered throughout churches in our county, yes serving the Lord and yes still part of the greater body of Christ and while we have done our best to stay connected it is just not the same. We have all missed out on the joy, love and blessings of being an intimate “forever church family” while here on earth.

I hope and pray that my children as they grow up and settle down wherever the Lord leads them that they will find a church family that they will commit to and that they will be blessed to have members with that same commitment.  Does that exist anymore? I believe it can if we each just start today with our own decision to commit to our church family…..forever.

To say that I don’t have time right now is like saying that Bill Gates just has a little extra “walking around money”. Yes that would be an understatement.

Besides the regular routine of  mothering, homeschooling, household management, my home based business and my “part time” job (yada yada)… I am working ’round the clock on the annual Jim Elliot Christian High School Dinner Auction which is just over a week away (and I still need to sell 150 tickets..yikes, gather up last minute auction donations and work daily with my team of volunteers).  Add to that my homeschoolers have state testing this week, not having gone to bed before 2am in days and having kids going “down for the count” daily with the stomach flu…and yes extra time is just about non existent in my life right now.

Yet today despite all of this…I managed to throw on some red, white & blue, grab some flags out of the closet and drive downtown to City Hall for a 45 minute rally at our Stockton City Tea Party.

Why did I stop in the midst of the craziness of my current life to attend a rally where no one was expecting me or perhaps it didn’t even matter if I was there?  Why did I overcome my own personal objections of weariness, busyness and other obligations?  WHY?  WHY? WHY?

• Because I believe in the message!
• Because I am role modeling for and training my children.  They are watching and listening to not just what I say….but what I do.
• Because in the future when I am asked – “Why did you not try to do something to stop this mess?”  I will be able to with a clear conscience say – I did do something!

There is so much more that I could say about how sometimes we just need to throw out our excuses as to why we can’t do something….and just do it! (but I will just let me actions speak for me this time)

Life went on today….even though I spent 45 minutes at a rally letting my voice be heard and then another 45 minutes sharing that with you in this blog! And no one may ever remember that I let my voice be heard today, but I will lay my head on the pillow tonight with perfect peace that I have stood for what I believe in, have role modeled that to my children and have began the fight for our future generation who will have to bear the brunt of our current actions. 

Is there something in your life that you say you believe in and that you just are not making the time to do? Or perhaps you really do not have the time? So what….just do it! (This is what I said to myself this morning as I contemplated “skipping out” on this event and listed all the reasons I just didn’t have the time)

Lately I have been coming in contact with more and more people who seem to have a common philosophy on life - the general theme is that they have “no regrets”  in life about anything.  It often seems to come across with a bit of pomp and arrogance that says even though they have not lived a “perfect”  life  or that they have made some mistakes, none of it matters as long as they see it as an “experience”. They also follow it up with abundant clarity that no one better even suggest that they think any differently.

Another common characteristic I have found in many with this philosophy, is that they are typically in the younger ”under 30″  (which is quickly becoming the new “under 40″) crowd. Perhaps they just have not yet had enough life experience to realize that it is ok and actually even helpful  to regret something you did or didn’t do in life, even if it, in the end, worked out or caused you to grow or gave you an unexpected blessing. Or perhaps it has nothing to do with age, wisdom or experience.

Many of these “no regreters” rely on and relish in quotes like these from authors and celebrities who have made more than there fair share of detrimental mistakes.

“Never regret. If it’s good, it’s wonderful. If it’s bad, it’s experience.”
 
“I have no regrets in my life. I think that everything happens to you for a reason. The hard times that you go through build character, making you a much stronger person.”
 
“I never regret anything. Because every little detail of your life is what made you into who you are in the end.” 
 
Now don’t get me wrong, I can appreciate seeing life’s struggles, problems and even mistakes as working out for good and even helping you to grow, mature and become a better person. I can also understand not wallowing in your past mistakes. I can even embrace a “no regrets” philosophy if it has its roots in taking worthwhile risks and living life outside of the norm or when looking to the future and saying – “I want to live a life of no regret”.

But really…no regrets about the past?? ever?? 

 I certainly have regrets – some of which I will share here -

• I regret the relationship I had with a boy for three years during high school… for a myriad of reasons.
• I regret that I didn’t apply myself to learning more while I was in college.  I wasted my time and my parents money by not being more diligent
• I regret that I did not live more frugally and be wiser with my money.
• I regret that I went back to work after the birth of my first child. I cannot get that time back no matter what.
• I deeply regret that I did not do something more pro active to help a dear former student who ended up taking her life. 
• I regret allowing myself to gain weight after each child was born. Losing 1o lbs would have been much easier than losing 50lbs.
• I regret losing control and screaming at my kids.
• I regret things that I have said flippantly that have hurt others.
• I regret the times I have not walked in integrity – by embellishing reality or omitting details or using words to mask the complete truth

Those are just a few of regrets I have in my life and even though yes, each of them has helped mold and make me into the person I am today – it is actually because I have regretted them that they have impacted me, impacted those around me and made a positive difference in who I am today.  If I had not regretted them – then why would I need to change or grow?  Why not just keep on making the same mistakes or even greater ones and chalking it up to – simple life experience – because good or bad it will be part of who I become?

The regret over things done or not done, mistakes made, sins committed should be what changes us and makes us into a better person!  

Besides that, there simply are things in life everyone should regret  -

• like hurting other people through your words or actions,
• like stealing, cheating or lieing,
• like being responsible for the injury or death of another life,
• like neglecting, abusing or abandoning your children,
• like being unfaithful to your marriage vows,
• or how about not making time for your loved ones  (unfortunatly this regret often comes after they are taken from you)

- to name just a few things that one should have regret about.

Isn’t having a life philosophy of  “no regrets”  really just a mask for saying that there is nothing you do that is right or wrong? No absolute truth? You have no personal responsibility for your actions? It is all just about how you decide to see life? You can do anything and the consequences will all work out in the end?

I think a better life philosophy would be – redeeming my regrets!

That we should all take a long hard look at our regrets in life and look for ways to redeem those things.  Perhaps we should redeem our regrets by  -

• helping others avoid doing the same thing by being transparent and honest about the true damage we have caused through or action or inaction. 
• or we could go back and fix things through apologies, restitution’s and repairs (although unfortunately some things just can’t be fixed).  
• why not use the pain of past regrets to catapult us into a present course of action that we will be pleased and proud of and that will give us a future of satisfaction and fulfillment of a life well lived.

Redeeming your regrets….now there is a life philosophy I can get behind!

Ok….so I am watching the Superbowl. 

But not because I am a “die hard” football fan, although I do like the sport more than many women I know.  Not because I particularly care about either team, I will always be a San Diego Charger fan (due in part to having lived there two different times for a total of  six years and because my Dad was a native “San Diegan”) as well as a Washington Redskin follower (if you have ever lived within the beltway I think you have to become a fan or else!) not too mention my passion - GO NAVY!  BEAT ARMY! (which is self explanatory for any military children out there – the rest of you just might not get it). And most definitely it is not because I do not have a massive amount of work to be accomplished. (I do!)

So why am I about to spend four hours of my life on the couch eating chips & cowboy dip (that I shouldn’t be eating) and watching a game (that I am not super interested in) on our postage stamp size, bunny eared TV (with not so great reception)?

•  Because my husband loves football and… I love my husband!  He comes from a football playing, football loving family.  He played in high school and then went on to coach that same team for the next ten years before he retired from coaching to spend more time in ministry and become a Daddy.  When I married him, I married a football fan. So throughout our married life I have been well aware that many Saturday & Sunday afternoons would be spent watching football.
• Because although we have been blessed with six daughters who will never find themselves on the gridiron (and will not be cheering either – I won’t even get into my anti cheerleading bias, lest I make some enemies) - it looks like we just might have a future football player in our family in our newest little boy whose first word was “ball”, who at 20 months will sit down & actually watch an entire game with his dad (this is NOT normal for a toddler of either gender!), who can easily identify a football player or ball on the TV, computer or even on a magazine in the grocery store, who bends down & says “hut, hut, hike” the minute the game begins (it is sooooooooo cute!) and who is rarely found without a ball in his hand.  I actually hope his passion continues as I would love being a football Mom (call me crazy!)
• 
• And finally because this is where the family is convened this afternoon and I love being together with my family in one room. (even if as I look up from my laptop – three of the girls have already fallen asleep)

 So…here is my commentary on the highlights of today’s game  -

The recognition of the courageous hero’s of  1549 that crash landed in the Hudson River earlier   – the pilot Chesley Sullenberger and his crew – who could help but not be inspired by this group.  And I couldn’t help but thinking that each of those who were on that flight are thanking the Lord that they are alive today to witness yet another Super Bowl.

The honoring of our military by having  General David H. Petraeus, commander of U.S. Central Command, perform the ceremonial coin toss for the Arizona Cardinals’ and Pittsburgh Steelers’ team captains.  I am so pleased that at this much watched event, we give honor to those who truly deserve it!

The Walter Payton Man of the Year Award was presented to quarterback Kurt Warner for his philanthropy.  Warner, who led the Cardinals to their first championship game in 60 years, created a partnership with Habitat for Humanity to sponsor construction throughout the Midwest. He has raised over $450,000, including a $100,000 personal contribution, $100,000 from his foundation, and $100,000 each from the Cardinals and the NFL Disaster Relief Fund.  Bravo Kurt! I love to see those who have been blessed with fame and fortune using it for the good of others.

I also love it that Kurt Warner and his wife  have seven children, he has adopted two of them (one with disabilities) and is a believer!  What an inspirational role model.

And though I am always hearing about the great Super Bowl commercials – I must admit I spent much of the time working on my lap top during the commercials and half time performance.  Besides, it was my way of boycotting NBC for their censorship of one commercial that SHOULD have been aired today. (You can read the deal here – http://www.lifenews.com/nat4801.html)   Here is this amazing commerical –

I love an exciting finish….and even though the girls and I were all rooting for the Cardinals (because we love Kurt Warner) my dear darling hubby was quite happy with “his” team the Pittsburgh Steelers winning yet another Super Bowl.  The back & forth at the end gets the adrenalin going and there was lots of cheering and sitting at the edge of our seats (as well as coaching from the couch for Dan)!  What a great game.

Finally I love to listen to the post game interviews always hoping for some of these athletes, who many across this nation look up to, will be great role models and give God the glory for their athletic abilities and amazing life!  Unfortunately the Lord was not publicly recognized by anyone this year, which was disappointing because….after all, without Him there is nothing.

Hey…one last thing – if anyone out there reading this blog won some money in a Super Bowl pool – I’ve got a great non profit organization you can donate some of your windfall too – Jim Elliot Christian High School – an incredible ministry to young people committed to raising up teens to go out and have a positive impact on the world (and yes, we have a football team…go Eagles…baby Daniel’s future team!)

 Just go to www.jechs.wordpress.com , click on Support JECHS and then click on “donate online”.  I can’t think of anything better to do with your winnings!

January is National Right to Life Month.

If you have read much of my blog or have known me for longer than 24 hours you most likely are well aware that one of my passions is LIFE!  I believe that all human life is a precious gift from God to be more highly valued than riches, possessions, personal pleasure or pursuits. I believe that every human being has the “right” to life – no matter their size, their level of development, their environment or their degree of dependency.

Do you believe that?

* Size – Are bigger people more human or more valuable than smaller people?  Is a baby born at full term weighing 7lb 11 oz more human than the one born in the room next door at 26 weeks gestation weighing 1lb 6oz? For my dear friend who delivered her baby at 15 weeks and held in the palm of her hand a tiny yet perfectly formed little baby boy and saw his perfect little hands, toes, eye brows and tiny little finger nails- she can tell you that her tiny baby was valuable and human.

Level of Development- Certainly we do not want to live in an elitist society that says only people with a certain level of development are human and valuable?  Are you at a higher development level  - physically, emotionally and mentally –  now than when you were 5 or 15 or  even 25 for that matter. I certainly am.  And as I age, I realize that in many ways my development will actually start deteriorating  (especially in the physical arena) – does that mean I am less valuable or human?  Level of Development does not make a life valuable.  No matter what our level of development, no matter what our disabilities, we have the right to life.

Environment – Does where we live determine our right to life or our value as a human being?  I have lived -

• under my parents 14 ”roofs” (in seven different cities, in four states)
• in a dorm room at UOP
• in two different apartments and a rental home
• in my own home (well ok, really the banks home)

….and in my mothers womb! I have been a valuable human being with the right to life in each and everyone of those places. Why would anyone suggest that an 8 inch trip down the birth canal somehow makes you human?

Degree of Dependency - Dependency is irrelevant to value in human beings.  My 21 month old precious baby boy (I refuse to call him a toddler yet) is completely dependant on others to sustain his life.  My 19 year old amazing daughter is completely dependant on insulin to stay alive. Someday I just might be completely dependant on my children due to the loss of my health or ability to work t0 provide for my needs – will that make me not valuable or have the right to life? In many ways we are all dependant on someone or something to sustain our life. And for those of us who have others depending on us to sustain their lives….are we not morally and ethically responsible to provide that need?

Bottom Line – Why is it ok to end the life of  a baby before they are born?

My passion for life is not something I just talk about – it is something I have actively lived out by -

• praying, praying & praying
• sharing my passion for the unborn with young people for the past 25 years
• teaching & training those same young people to defend the rights of the unborn
• having the privilege of being able to “rescue” a teenager literally right from out of an abortionists hands (her beautiful daughter is now 20 years old & living a wonderful life!)
• being arrested & going to jail for peaceful civil disobedience while protesting abortion (no signs, no words,no threats)
• being personally open to every life the Lord wants to bless us with – at any age, under any circumstances, at any time
• being willing to adopt any baby (no, not just a “perfect” baby) that a mother is unable to raise for whatever reason (really!  If you know of someone with a “unwanted” pregnancy we would love to raise their baby in our loving home)
• having an “open home” policy for anyone in a crisis pregnancy (or any other crisis for that matter)
• donating baby clothes, diapers and money to the Pregnancy Help Center in Stockton
• participating in fund raisers for Pregnancy Crisis Centers
• teaching, training, influencing and inspiring my own seven children to be actively pro-life
• and this past Saturday our entire family participated for the first time (but not the last!) in the Walk for Life in San Francisco with over 30,000 others who are taking a stand for the right to life for the unborn. 

These type of events help to solidify your and your children’s convictions in every way – from the inspirational speakers, the testimonies from women who regret their abortions, the warm, wonderful & diverse fellowship with fellow walkers and even listening to the angry protesters rhetoric ignites passion & purpose.

My eldest daughter, Michelle,  participated in the March for Life in Washington DC two days prior to our event (and I have to say I am one proud Mommy – she has been passed the baton & is running with it!)

She got to hear incredible “right on” speakers like Pastor Luke Robinson -

If you too believe in the right to life for the unborn,  I would ask you today….what are you doing to “talk the talk” AND ”walk the walk”?  Together we can – stop the killing of innocent life.

 * The SLED acronym was learned from Scott Klusendorf one of the best defenders of life in our country!(www.prolifetraining.com)

Four years…will fly by!

How do I know?  Well after dragging my kids out of bed last Tuesday to watch the historic inauguration of our first black president (which we would have watched the inauguration events no matter who was being sworn in – to me it is patriotic!), I began to reminisce on past inaugurations.

• Just four years ago in 2005 three of my girls – Michelle, Amy & Rebekah attended the inauguration of George W Bush for his second term
• 
• Four years previous to that in 2001, Michelle, after working for months volunteering her time for the Republican Central Committee (as an 11 year old….mind you!) raised the funds and secured a ticket from our congressman to attend Bush’s first inauguration! 
• 
• of course I can remember the 1997 inauguration of Bill Clinton because my four girls ages 7, 4, 3 and 18 months and I made & ate an entire batch of chocolate chip cookie dough to drown our sorrows. (ok, so the girls were happy even before the cookie dough except for perhaps Michelle who even at seven was already political)
• 
• During the 1993 inauguration I only had two little girls…just a “starter kit” family
• 
• If you go back to the 1989 innaguaration of George H Bush I was pregnant with Michelle just beginning my nine months of non stop “morning sickness”.
• 
• And in 1985 I was single (not even considering matrimony or motherhood!) & a youth pastor for over 100 teens
• 
• 1981, after voting for the first time the previous November for Ronald Reagan, I was an 18 year old freshman at the University of the Pacific
• 

That is only eight inaugurations since my being old enough to vote.  Then I began to do the math….our children will be at home with us for,  a mere four or at the most five inaugurations.  FOUR!!!???  Does that not seem like an incredibly small amount of time when you put it in perspective?  I know that when “your guy”  is not in office four years may seem like an eternity.  But it really does just fly by like all of life once you enter the “adult world”. (When I was a child everything seemed to take forever to get here…is that still the case today?) 

So wether you are lamenting or rejoicing in the next four years under our current administration

• Take a moment to realize and let it sink in how very short four years is and how incredibly fast it will go by
• Take a moment to count how many innaguarations your kids have left under your roof (Michelle is already up & out, this was the last innaguration for Amy & Kristen to be at home….<big sigh & gulp>, Rebekah has one left, Grace has two, Joy has three and Daniel has four)
• Take a moment to decide what are you going to do with that time you have left, Lord willing, with your children?

Be purposeful in your parenting.  Have a plan and inact that plan! You have four short “terms of office” as their parents to

• mold and shape them into people of character & conscience
• teach and train them in the principles of the Word of God
• disciple and mentor them to fear the Lord and glorify Him in all that they do
• influence them to be life giving and show love to the “least of these” – the orphans, widows, elderly, disabled, depressed, outcasts, enslaved and the unborn
• inspire them to live a life of service that will make a difference and have a lasting impact

Take an oath today that you will be purposeful in your parenting during the term of office you have left.  Don’t let these years just pass you by – all too soon your term will be up and your legacy will be carried on….for better or for worse by your children. What will history write about your parenting?